Being Present: Bearing Witness to your Thoughts
In most current discussions about being present there is some mention of mindfulness. Practicing mindfulness is developing an awareness of our thoughts, behaviors and emotions that allows you to be more in the moment. Mindfulness has been paired with everything from meditation to eating to running. In essence, mindfulness is a movement toward separating from your thoughts, behaviors and emotions in order to create a calmer, less reactionary state of being in the present.
There are many components to a mindful practice. Some core elements of this process are to focus on your breathe, stay in the present moment, non-judgemental observation, and non-attachment. Another key in mindfulness is bearing witness to your thoughts rather than entangling yourself in your thoughts. An example of this detachment is seen in the redefining of the following thought. “I am angry about what my partner just said,” changes to “I’m noticing some angry emotions rise as a result of what I have just heard.” In this example, there is a subtle difference from experiencing the emotion to noticing the thought and emotion that can allow an exchange to result in a discussion rather than a fight.
“The day you decide that you are more interested in being aware of your thoughts than you are in the thoughts themselves - that is the day you will find your way out.”
~ Michael Singer, The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself
The above referenced quote showcases the art of bearing witness to your thoughts when practicing mindful living. The idea of witnessing your thoughts is to not identify with or hold on to your thoughts, but rather view them as you would objects passing you as you travel on a train. When you observe your thoughts from this outlook you allow yourself enough space to create a less emotional response. This distancing technique of mindfulness offers a different type of vista. When talking with clients I often describe it as a “metaview”, meaning a view of your emotional process from a different vantage point, perhaps a perspective “above” or “beyond,” rather than being “in” the experience. Witnessing your thoughts allows for you to avoid becoming the situation, thought, and/or emotional reaction.
As a therapist, I bear witness to people’s stories. I listen carefully without judgement, I reflect without opinion and I sit outside the situation. These components of bearing witness can be internalized and practiced. The following tips may help you implement the witnessing process for yourself.
Be observant like a scientist with your thoughts, behaviors and emotions. A scientist looks for cause and effect. There may be a hypothesis, but there is also a measured method of testing and noticing. Science doesn’t rely on emotion, but on observations, trials, and outcomes. Be the one who watches.